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Monday, November 7, 2011

The Name Change Question

I enjoyed this recent article from MSNBC. This one, from Jezebel, was pretty good, too. It is kind of alarming that 50% of Americans think changing a woman's name after marriage should be required; I mean, at least let us decide for ourselves. Is it some kind of grasp to save conventional marriage in the face of the gay rights movement?

What do you think about name changing? This is something I've obviously been thinking about lately, and I'd love to hear your take on it.

This is interesting: John's actually more resolute about me keeping "Maxwell" than I am. He doesn't think I should change my name at all.

Sometimes I lean towards taking "Concklin," but for me, it's not about observing an old tradition. It's about being so excited about forming our own family that I'm interested in a decision, on my part, to create a unified familial identity for us. It's about being ecstatic about that family's future. It's because I love John so much that this appeals to me. It's a way to symbolize my commitment to the success of our newly formed unit.

I do run into a few problems, though. First of all, I love the name Maxwell. I always have. In some ways, I consider it more essential to my identity than Lauren. I always loved that it set me apart from the millions of other Laurens that popped out in the '80s. Maxwell associates me with a dad and an aunt and a lovely set of grandparents whom I'm proud to call my own. Maxwell gives me the automatic slogan "good to the last drop." Maxwell is just...my name.

I'm considering taking Concklin legally but still being Lauren Maxwell, for the most part. We'll see.

What will you do when you marry?


1 comment:

  1. Great post, Lauren! I think whatever you decide will be the right choice for you because 1) you're an intelligent, introspective woman and 2) you and John love and respect each other.
    I kept my name because it is a large part of my personal identity. As you said, "it sets me apart from the millions of other" Sarahs, and, YES, it is strangely more "me" sometimes.
    When a kiddo is added to our group, we've decided to give my last name as a middle name (boy or girl).
    Lastly, I'm lazy. I didn't want to go through the hassle of legally changing all of my documents and the bills that were in my name. :)


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